User blog:Pinkguy the b0ss/Hardest Levels in the Donkey Kong Country Games
You probably know the Donkey Kong Country games on the SNES. They're probably one of the finest series of games ever made. It's also no secret that these games are pretty tough. This list (or, set of lists, I suppose) will be composed of my personal hardest or most infuriating levels in these games. Each game will get its own list, and then there will be a bunch of combination lists. These lists are based on the SNES versions of each game, because they're the more well-known ones. I may do the GBA versions eventually, but not right now. I hope you enjoy reading this and hearing my thoughts on these stages. Donkey Kong Country 10. Orangutan Gang - This stage takes place in a jungle, being the last appearance of this level type in the game. Basically, you have to avoid several Klaptraps, Zingers, and jumping Kritters, which are not all that hard to dodge. What really makes this level a challenge (and by extension, more fun for me) is the Manky Kongs. They toss barrels at you, and you jump over them, trying not to get hit. They honestly provide a pretty fun challenge. 9. Oil Drum Alley - Another level that features Manky Kongs. This time, though, something else is added on - flaming oil drums. Obviously, you can't touch the top of them, or you'll get burned. Once again, the Manky Kongs in combination with other setpieces make this level a satisfying challenge that's loads of fun. 8. Elevator Antics - This level is set in a cave, and it starts off fairly tame. It seems like yet another typical cave level, except with a few nut spitting Mini-Neckies and rope climbing sections. But, as soon as you hit the checkpoint, you realize that the level isn't joking around anymore. Tons of Klumps and Zingers guard elevator sections with the help of some Mini-Neckies. The elevators provide pretty challenging jumps, having you jump on an elevator and then quickly jump off in order to avoid death by Zinger or bottomless pit. It's genuinely one of the better levels in the game. 7. Blackout Basement - At first this may seem like it would be bad because the flickering lights may make visibility unbearable, due to how often the flicker. While, yes, it can be annoying on your first time playing, but I don't think enough credit is being given here. This level is well-designed and the light setpiece does not make the visibility as bad as everyone says it does. I actually really like this stage, because I find the gimmick to be a fun challenge. 6. Tanked Up Trouble - This level is how Chimp Caverns, the final world, makes its first impression, and wow. There's a reason nobody forgets this stage. The level's setpiece, a moving platform, was set up earlier in the level Trick Track Trek. However, the stakes are raised this time, as the platform in Tanked Up Trouble has limited fuel. In order to avoid losing, you have to collect the fuel barrels, all conveniently placed around enemies. It's a reasonable challenge that manages to keep you on your toes the whole way through, especially at a part near the end where a few fuel barrels given to you only give one unit of fuel, and it feels like the platform is about to fall multiple times. The last part with the Zingers would easily be the hardest part, and would be annoying, but thankfully you can use a barrel cannon to skip that part. 5. Misty Mine - This one is yet another level from Chimp Caverns. This one takes place in the strangely creepy mine levels (mostly due to the sense of isolation and the music). It has a great atmosphere and some truly great design. The barrels that shoot enemies provide a fun challenge, and the moving ropes serve as a place to collect some bananas and relax for a second. The fog can obscure things a little bit, but not so much to make the level bad. So basically, it's a good, fun level. Next. 4. Snow Barrel Blast - This is the first ice level in the game, and it can be kind of annoying on your first playthrough. It's another one of those barrel cannon stages, and is unquestionably the hardest of them all. However, though, this doesn't mean it's a terrible level. The stage is reasonably fair and challenging throughout... until you make it to the end part, where the snow doesn't help as you go through a long barrel section requiring perfect accuracy. Thankfully, there's a shortcut. I beat this game on a flatscreen the first time, which does have input lag, so I'll bet if I tried to beat the level the normal way, it wouldn't be as annoying as I remember, but I just use the shortcut now because it's faster. Overall, though, not a bad level. 3. Ice Age Alley - Another snow level, and this time no warp or shortcut to speak of. That's no problem, though, because the level is not badly designed at all. There is one instance where the visibility could be better (a spot with a few platforms you basically have to take leaps of faith to reach), but it's one very brief moment so it doesn't ruin the stage for me. The level also has Manky Kongs, which provide a satisfying challenge that's lots of fun. 2. Platform Perils - This very well may be the best level in the game, no joke. It's the final level before the boss of Chimp Caverns and the final boss, and it doesn't mess around. You have to make jumps onto moving platforms that eventually drop into a bottomless pit if you stand on them too long. While doing that, you need to dodge Zingers, Armies, Klumps, Gnawties, and of course, a special Gray Krusha that requires you to hit it with a barrel to kill, exclusive to this level. It feels like a true test of skill and a perfect way to cap off the game's levels. 1. Poison Pond - This is what I consider to be the worst level in the game by a wide margin. It's the only bad level this game has to offer. Why? The visibility sucks. Hard. The putrid green color makes it difficult to see what's coming, since the primary enemy here, Bitesize, is also green and has a tendency to ambush you from offscreen (man I'm good at unintentional rhymes), especially at the last section of the stage. Thankfully, there's a shortcut, but if you have two Expresso tokens, forget about it. There's one in the way of the shortcut. Collecting it will force you back to the checkpoint after a short minigame, and trust me, you do not want that to happen. Finally, just to add salt to the wound, this is one of the longest levels in the game. I love Donkey Kong Country, but man, does Poison Pond suck. Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest 10. Windy Well - Obviously at least one level from K. Rool's Keep was gonna make it onto this list, and trust me, this won't be the last. It takes place in a mineshaft, and you have to make your way to the top of the level. In order to do so, you jump and suddenly get pushed upwards by a wind current, and from there you have to dodge obstacles that come your way, be it Zingers or Krooks. What makes it challenging is its element of unpredictability combined with the limited control you have of your environment. Since the wind dictates your motion, you have to be cautious with every move you make. 9. Rattle Battle - This is one of several dedicated animal buddy levels in this game, and funny enough, it's a bit on the easier side compared to some of those levels. In Rattle Battle, you take control of Rattly as he bounces through a sunken ship, fighting enemies and using some of them as platforms. For some reason, a lot of the time I would take a hit and fall into the bottomless pit below the Zingers. Other times, I would just die from enemies. I was getting angry and blaming the game, but it was clearly me making horrible mistakes because I wanted to speed through the level (also I played on a flatscreen at first, which has input lag, so there's that too). Looking back, it isn't the hardest thing ever, so it's pretty low down on the list. 8. Red-Hot Ride - This level has you riding on hot air balloons. They slowly lose height until they hit lava below, which obviously isn't good. In order to avoid dying, you have to sit on streams of air that raise your balloon. Be careful, though, as there are sometimes enemies around these streams, so you can't spend more than a second on a few. This is a slight spike in the difficulty curve, as it appears in the second world, but because of that, there's a warp in the level, which allows you to quickly pass it. I consider it a sort of "sister level" to Minecart Carnage from DKC1, even though it's not even a minecart/rollercoaster level, mostly because it's an early difficulty spike that can be easily passed by using a hidden warp. 7. Haunted Hall - Haunted Hall, unlike the last entry on this list, actually is a rollercoaster level. In it, you are chased by a giant phantom Kremling called Kackle, and you have to touch special barrels marked with plus signs to increase the amount of time Kackle has before he can touch you, while avoiding minus barrels that decrease that time. It's not too hard once you get the hang of it, but your first time? It's pretty hard to say the least. Funny story - the first time I ever beat this level was from a glitch that prevented Kackle from spawning in when I reached the last section..... then I got a game over on the next level, Gusty Glade, since Haunted Hall drained my lives. Oh well, I eventually got used to it and passed the level. 6. Rickety Race - Another rollercoaster level. In this one, you race several enemies to the end of a roller coaster track. You aren't actually required to win the race, but the level is easier if you do. It's not overly punishing if you memorize the level or have good reflexes and reaction time, but if you don't, it's a nightmare your first time (probably because I was on a flatscreen with terrible input lag). Honestly, though, this level has grown on me and it's now one of my favorites. Time for another story - I spent almost a whole night trying to beat the level, and several times I slammed my controller, which actually made the D-pad break a slight bit (it surprisingly still works considering it was a Buffalo controller; I soon got an OEM controller that's much better), and actually almost blew the picofuse on my console since I accidentally ejected the game while the console was still on out of rage. Eventually, I rage quit and the whole experience left a bad taste in my mouth and thoughts of accusing the level of being impossible..... until the very next morning, when I literally passed the level in two or three tries. Thus, a brand new meme was born as I laughed at myself and wanted to die. I have to scratch my ass. 5. Castle Crush - Told you that Windy Well wouldn't be the last level from K. Rool's Keep on this list. This is the first castle level in the game, which, by the way, have some pretty kick-ass music . In this level, you're on a rising platform that enemies just so happen to fall onto every now and then. Obviously, you have to avoid them. Overall, it's a pretty cool level and the atmosphere is dark and foreboding. But damn, it's pretty tough. Sometimes, the enemies are tough to predict, and their attacks are very hard to avoid. But, I think it's still a good level and none of the deaths came from scrappy mechanics or poor visibility. 4. Screech's Sprint - This level starts off in just another bramble section. It has some pretty interesting design with jumps that require you to use the somersault jump or Dixie's helecopter hair to traverse, and some tough spots where you avoid enemies on ropes. The challenge truly starts when you reach the midpoint. You turn into Squawks (technically making this an animal buddy level), and race the evil parrot Screech through a challenging obstacle course of Zingers and tight squeezes through bramble "walls." There is, though, an alternative way to beat this level: if you take damage near Screech, and rapidly press B to fly over him while you have invincibility frames (which, trust me, isn't as complicated as it sounds), you'll be able to beat the level without racing him. There's also a double shortcut so you can skip the first part of the race. However, I actually find doing the race normally to be easier, since you get two hits instead of one, and Screech isn't programmed with any bullshit rubberbanding or anything. Overall, I really enjoy this stage. 3. Web Woods - One of the hardest animal buddy levels, but not the hardest. You take control of Squitter the Spider after a short section of dodging enemies as usual. Since the level is practically 70% bottomless pit, you have to create web platforms in order to reach the goal. Enemies such as Zingers, Kannons, and Mini-Neckies attack you, so you have to use your standard web shoot attack to take them down. It's also one of the longest levels in the game. It took me a good two weeks to beat this level, but once I did, it was satisfying, let me tell you. 2. Chain Link Chamber - Wow, this one is insane. You have to climb on chains, with a ton of enemies such as Zingers, Kutlasses, and Klobbers trying to kill you. The hardest part of the level has to be when you're forced to dodge Kannons' cannonballs by moving from one chain to another. Once again, however, the game is not to blame for any deaths, only you. It's certainly a hard level, but it's not the hardest this game has to offer. 1. Toxic Tower - I bet you didn't see this one coming. This has got to be the hardest level in the game, only because of one long, drawn-out section at its beginning. You start by avoiding some extremely-hard-to-dodge Klampons as you end up at a transformation barrel. Below you is green, water-like liquid, which is actually acid. In order to not die, you have to make your way up the castle, and fast, because the acid doesn't care if you take too long, it's gonna burn you no matter what. I said before that there's a transformation barrel at the start of the level, which turns you into an animal buddy. So, what animal buddy did they go with? Why, Rattly of course! You know, the slowest of the buddies? Also, you know what will work well (alliteration lol)? Jumps that are so high, they require Rattly's super jump, which takes a good four seconds to charge enough in order to execute it properly! Pretty convenient, given that you have to get away from the acid as fast as you can, right? Oh, and if you fail the super jump once or twice, you're basically screwed. Thankfully, the second half of the level isn't that bad, as you take control of Squawks and Squitter, who were made for level design like this. But Rattly? Really? To be honest, it's not completely awful once you've done it a few times and gotten somewhat used to it, but that doesn't change my opinion that the Rattly section (which is the longest of the three... good luck if you stick around this far into the game) is somewhat annoying. Honestly though, since the rest of the game is so amazing, fun, well-designed and polished, I find it difficult to care. To me, this is the only level in the game that's far from great, but even then, it's at worst only mildly annoying. Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie Kong's Double Trouble FAIR WARNING - This game is my least favorite in the original trilogy, and I happen to dislike the SNES version (the GBA version is solid though). so I'm gonna go all in and rip these levels to shreds since maybe only two of them on this list are actually decent to good. Expect a lot of low blows and a METRIC ASS TONNE of swearing. I wanted to put this out there, because this is going to be one of the angriest moments in ''any of my posts. So if you can't handle that kind of stuff for whatever reason, STAY AWAY. I'm serious, this is your only warning. If you decide to read this and you're scared off, I'm sorry in advance. With that out of the way, let's begin.'' 10. Poisonous Pipeline - Ok, this is the nicest this list is going to be. This level is tougher than most in the game, all because it takes place in poison water that flips your D-pad controls. Kind of mean in concept, but surprisingly decent in execution. Now I don't mean to brag, but I actually managed to beat this level in one try. No joke. Granted, I did get hit a few times, but I never died. The level is challenging, but I didn't have too many problems with it despite its gimmick messing with my head here and there (predictably). 9. Low-G Labyrinth - This level, to be honest, is at worst mildly annoying. The gravity mechanic is an interesting gimmick, but it makes avoiding enemies unneccesarily harder than it should be, as one would predict, because of how damn slow you move. Overall, though, it's a decent enough level, just somewhat frustrating. Ok, now are you ready for this list to get nasty? Oh yeah, we're diving into some of the absolute worst and poorly-designed levels in this entire trilogy of wonderful games. These have got to be my least favorite levels in the whole trilogy? Ready? Then buckle up, because we're driving on the highway to hell tonight, and there's no speed limit. 8. Ripsaw Rage - I have one question to ask here: did Rare learn a single fucking lesson from Toxic Tower? Apparently not, instead they decided to have a fucking bring your booze to work day, and while they were at it, designed this mound of shit. In this crapshoot of a level, you run up a tree while narrowly avoiding enemies such as Buzzers while hopping on tree branches that are solid from below, meaning if you get caught under one (which is easy to do, mind you), you're screwed would be better buttfucking the ripsaw as it shoves itself up your ass and steals one of your lives. The thing is, this level bears an uncanny resemblance to Toxic Tower, as I mentioned earlier. It's basically the same thing, except without animal buddies, with new enemies, and with different graphics. Also, the level's name, "Ripsaw Rage," fits the level so well that it's actually frightening, because all you'll do is rage and rip your damn hair out over this shitheap. And worst of all, it's actually a decent concept, but its execution leaves a lot to be desired. 7. Konveyor Rope Klash - I don't have much to say about this one. What I will say is that IT FUCKING SUCKS. I mean, Goddamn, it's frustrating and exhausting. You have to grab on to conveyor-belt-like ropes that make you move forward faster than the sploodge that shot out of Peewee Herman's dick. Combined with the fact that jumping down off a rope is about as responsive as Bill Cosby's victims after a drinking party, you'll almost always fucking slam into an enemy when you were simply trying to jump down on the rope, also given that the hit detection in this game can be downright aggravating sometimes (more on that shit later). Another factor in this piss fountain is the camera, which is in a fucking conspiracy against you. It never pans enough for you to see what's ahead (again, more on that fucking piss later), being to blame for about half of the deaths you'll have on this level. Oh, and this is the first fucking impression the last world, or KAOS Kore. And believe me, this is just the beginning of the absolute hell that is the last world. You'll see. 6. Ropey Rumpus - This level is another pile of cow shit that's only difficult because of the fucking horrible camera. About 90% of the deaths you'll have on this asshole level (which you will have SO MANY of) are from enemy placement worse than being gangraped by greasy old scumfucks on the streets, and of course, the Godawful camera I just mentioned. This level puts a sour taste in my mouth and makes me nearly rip my fucking hair out (which I'm gonna be saying a lot from this point forward). This isn't the worst level in Razor Ridge, the crapfest that takes the place as World 6 of DKC3. Want to know why? Well... 5. Kong-Fused Cliffs - This stage makes me want to break something over my head. No, I'm not fucking kidding. This is one of those levels. One that you start, and then realize you're about to get fucked in the ass. Horrible enemy placement and a camera that makes me want to die turn this into a bitch of a level to finish. It's so bad, it's horrible indeed. 4. Demolition Drainpipe - This level drives me to the brink of fucking insanity. Why? All the aforementioned problems combined with the asshole move of making it a VEHICLE level! Now these weren't so bad in the last two games, but FUCK, they butchered it more than DC comics did with fucking BvS. The camera is awful, the toboggan controls like a sack of wet fecal matter, and you can die from fucking ANYTHING! Even JUMPING ON AN ENEMY AS YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO can end in you getting skullfucked by the enemy instead of it dying... LIKE IT'S FUCKING SUPPOSED TO!! 3. Tearaway Tobbogan - Aw, fuck, ANOTHER shit-sucking toboggan level. This time, they somehow made it fucking WORSE, and later on IN THE SAME DAMN GAME, no less. The hit detection is on a manhunt for you, the camera can suck my dick, and, worst of all, YOU CAN DIE BY HITTING A CABIN AT THE END OF THE LEVEL. IN '''NO OTHER' PART OF THIS LEVEL DOES THIS HAPPEN.'' YES, A FUCKING GLITCH CAN KILL YOU! And since you've already lost your extra hit, SORRY, FUCKER! You'll have to do this fucking shit all over again, only to be killed once again ''by an oversight by the developers, and not a fucking real reason. I despise this level. There's absolutely nothing good about it. 2. Lightning Lookout - You know what would be a 'FUN' idea? Dodging a lightning storm. Alright, ok, cool. Seems interesting enough. How will we make this "fun?" ''HOW ABOUT WE FUCKING MAKE IT SO RANDOM-ASS LIGHTNING THAT '''INSTA-KILLS YOU COMES DOWN OUT OF NOWHERE', FUCKING KILLS YOU IF YOU SO MUCH AS SCRAPE A SINGLE PIXEL OF WATER IF THE LIGHTNING STRIKES IT, DEPRIVE THE PLAYER OF FUCKING ESSENTIAL DK BARRELS, AND MAKE IT SO THE CAMERA AND HITBOXES SERVE TO MAKE IT ARTIFICIALLY HARDER? YEAH, SURE!! GREAT IDEA!!!!! YOU GET A PROMOTION!!! I SWEAR, THIS LEVEL IS SO FUCKING TERRIBLE '''IT MAKES WORLD WAR II LOOK LIKE '''AN ACT OF KINDNESS'' (ok, maybe not THAT far, but you get the point). Case closed, getting slammed in the head with a fucking frying pan is more fun than this shit. 1. Koindozer Klamber - KILL ME. KILL ME NOW. I DON'T WANT TO LIVE ON THE SAME DAMNED PLANET AS THE FUCKWIT WHO SUGGESTED THIS FUCKHEAP SHITSTAIN ASSBAG OF A "LEVEL" BE CREATED THE FUCKING WAY IT WAS. THIS SHITSAUCE WAS ACTUALLY DESIGNED BY A FUCKING BABOON. THEY WERE FUCKING JERKING OFF WHEN THEY MADE THIS ASSFUCK SHIT-SPRINKLED COCKSUCKING DEGENERATE DICKLESS HOPELESS SKULLFUCKING ABOMINATION THEY CALL A "LEVEL." THE FACT THAT I HAVE TO CALL IT A "LEVEL" IS AN INSULT TO SHIT LIKE POISON POND, TOXIC TOWER'S RATTLY SECTION, AND THE SCHLOCK THAT I'VE ALREADY PUT ON THIS VERY GODFORSAKEN LIST. ''"What makes it so bad," you may ask, "that it warrants this kind of treatment?" Well, let me tell you. You start this hellhole off innocently enough - no enemies in sight, a DK barrel nearby... ''UNTIL THAT LITTLE COCKSUCKING TWINKLE-TOED COMMUNIST PIECE OF SHIT KOINDOZER COMES UP OUT OF NOWHERE AND ASSFUCKS YOU INTO THE LEVEL'S LEFTMOST BARRIER. TRY ALL YOU WANT, BUT YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO GET AWAY FROM THAT COCKSUCKING MAGGOT. IF YOU DO, IT WILL RUN OVER TO YOU AND ALWAYS, AND I MEAN ALWAYS, KNOCK YOU INTO THE BOTTOMLESS PIT NEXT TO YOU. IF YOU TRY AGAIN AND ACTUALLY MANAGE TO MAKE IT PAST HIM, THE NEXT MOTHERFUCKER WILL ASSRAPE YOU INTO THE PIT AGAIN!!! YOU CAN TRY OVER AND OVER AND OVER, BUT YOU'LL DIE EVERY TIME. ''After this, there's a section where you jump on barrels that is a bit tough but nothing that will make you smash your TV... ''UNTIL YOU GET AMBUSHED BY ANOTHER COCK-CHOKING KOINDOZER AND INESCAPABLY GET FUCKING SKULLFUCKED INTO ANOTHER PIT!!!!! THE DIFFICULTY HERE IS MORE ARTIFICIAL THAN KIM KARDASHIAN'S FUCKING FAT PLASTIC ASS!!!!!!!!!! IT'S FAKER THAN THE POSSIBILITY OF A HILLARY PRESIDENCY!!!!!!!!!! IT DEFIES SO MUCH COMMON SENSE, THAT IT MAKES ME WANT TO LITERALLY RIP MY HAIR OUT AND THROW MY CONTROLLER INTO THE TV SCREEN!!!!! UNTIL I HAD ENOUGH. AFTER SEVERAL MONTHS OF REPEATED ATTEMPTS, I FINALLY BEAT THE FUCKING THING!!! TAKE THAT, YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKING SHIT-EATING FUCKUP OF A "LEVEL"!!!!!! AND, JUST TO INSULT YOUR INTELLIGENCE JUST A BIT MORE, RARE DECIDES TO PUT POISONOUS PIPELINE AFTER THIS FUCKFEST!! THEY PUT AN EASIER LEVEL AFTER THE MOST BROKEN, INFURIATING LEVEL IN THE WHOLE DKC TRILOGY?!?!?! WHAT ARE THEY FUCKING MAD?!?!?! WITHOUT A DOUBT, THIS EARNS MY VOTE FOR THE WORST LEVEL IN A DONKEY KONG GAME. BAR. FUCKING. NONE. I AM DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS. FUCK THIS SHIT, I'M DONE. Phew... ok, now back to not being completely insane. Combination Lists Hardest Overall 10. Platform Perils 9. Chain Link Chamber 8. Poison Pond 7. Ropey Rumpus 6. Demolition Drainpipe 5. Toxic Tower 4. Kong-Fused Cliffs 3. Tearaway Toboggan 2. Lightning Lookout 1. Koindozer Klamber Hardest Bosses Note - No bosses from the first DKC game are on this list because they're all fairly easy. 10. Arich (DKC3) 9. Squirt (DKC3) 8. Kleever (DKC2) 7. Kudgel (DKC2) 6. King Zing (DKC2) 5. KAOS fight in Mekanos a.k.a. World 4 (DKC3) 4. Bleak (DKC3) 3. Kreepy Krow (DKC2) 2. Kaptain K. Rool (DKC2) 1. Barbos (DKC3) Kong-clusion Haha yes, very funny. So funny THAT IT MAKES ME WANT TO LITERALLY RIP MY HAIR OUT AND THROW MY CONTROLLER INTO THE TV SCREEN!!!!! ..... Anyways. These lists took me way too long to make. I actually spent over half a year to compile them all (mostly because I had to play through three whole games, and given other factors such as shipping time and stuff like that), but I'll be damned if I say it wasn't a fun experience. The Donkey Kong Country trilogy for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System will always be one of the finest series of platformers ever crafted, up there with the likes of Mario, Sonic, Megaman, and many, many others... well, at least the first two games are. Thanks for reading, my Shreks, and have a great day. Category:Blog posts